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Atlantic Salt

by Olivia Sisay

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Dan Szetela
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1.
Come Down 04:04
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Dizzy head with a steady hand While the wind blows over the electricity plant Waking up in a familiar bed But my mind is on some strange planet Crying in the car before I jumped in I could see the tears on my mother’s chin We sang along to the radio Seat sticking on the heat of my skin Childlike in love again What's darkness at noon? What stretches past the living room? What leaves after her perfume? Come down, come down I feel no shame Where could I learn shame? Calm down, calm down I’m here now And I want you just the same How often do you shut your mouth? Do you see me as a woman? Are we messing around? I’m hard to love but the time is now The ground’s gone to freezing But I’m warm somehow And she said I could do what I wanted to If she believed that, I believe in you The moon and her tender stare won’t rise above the clouds tonight But I know that she’s there Come down, come down I feel no shame Where could I learn shame? Calm down, calm down I’m here now And I want you just the same
2.
Atlantic Salt 02:59
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You said you couldn’t sweat me out Didn’t know where to start I think I scare you Like I’m a phantom, or a child in your arms Thought about getting mad Thought about getting sober Maybe I would have embraced disaster If it meant you’d let me back in when it was over Head on your lap Nose pressed to your thigh thinking Pennsylvania couldn’t wait to see me cry I’m coming home Where time can be slow I’m coming home Am I freezing or burning? Sleeping or stirring? I waded in the Atlantic salt Trying hard not to let the tears come flowing Don’t like the grass on my skin Or the imposter summer You wouldn’t want these parts of me Even if I was working on it and things were better So I pack the car Wipe my nose on my sleeve thinking Pennsylvania just can’t bear to watch me leave I’m coming home You better leave me alone I’m coming home
3.
Bitter 02:52
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Been asleep for months on end now Had to go and open up your mouth to let your tongue explore my face Outside the gas station I smile with my teeth and contemplate how I could ruin everything Don’t play the victim We both know the graves we’ve been digging Already ran the marathon Here is your medal What else are you winning? I know you too well I know you too well I just know you too well I’ll be in the house for now And if you come around here I might yell like someone’s knocking down my door “Why’s it gotta be like that?” you said, “Why you gotta be like that? If we can’t talk, what am I even for?” Humor me as a favor I’ll spit up my words and I’ll eat them later I’m not the one who’s bitter but I’ll be the bitch and I’ll call you later You know me too well You know me too well You just know me too well
4.
I Keep Accidentally Smoking Indoors 02:58
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I know that you’re over it And I’m dealing how you’d think that I might I watch the steam roll off the mattress Smoke you out the window all the time I sit upright at my desk And I wonder why, when I was stretched out thin, you loved me best You were always out there looking for superior views I thought that I could find you that You know I wanted to What were you to me when I came home And dropped my clothes all in a pool at my feet? I cut my hair just like yours I’ve said goodbye to trying to be subtle I’d give anything to see you as you are now But that would just turn into trouble Cause I got this immeasurable curse You’re in the things I’m saying now, mixed into every word Yeah it’s bad and it’s just getting worse I’ve been carrying you around and they can see it Like I’m driving your hearse What was I to you on the rooftop singing While the wind was turning our fingers blue? I know that you’re over it And I’m dealing how you’d think that I might But I bet one day I might sneak back in your brain Maybe one final time
5.
Boy for You 03:11
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Good luck getting out of this one, baby Twenty-one chewing on ice in front of me Saw you while I was lost at sea Salt beginning You were there, kissing my mouth on Sunday Monday rolled my tongue up like a rug You had to leave But it’s you I’ve seen in a thousand dreams I was there falling on concrete thinking, Maybe I chill you to the bone like winter wind. If this was my last snow, I’d do my time. If you’re the last face that I see, well, that's fine. Were you sitting down when you realized I’m not gonna be the boy for you? It's alright! Some people never have to choose I’ll put the bottle down, too But I’m not gonna be the boy for you Thin hair, liquor stare, don’t you beg me If you like banging up your knees then go ahead The bets are off You need to fall You’re in school for a little while longer I’ll be around when the world starts feeling small You’ve got no plan I see the end It’s not the worst idea to feel it coming on Were you sitting down when you realized I’m not gonna be the boy for you? It's alright! Some people never have to choose I’ll put the bottle down, too But I’m not gonna be the boy for you I had butterflies in my belly Won’t tell the truth but you don’t lie Isn’t it silly? What if you never have to choose? I’ll put the bottle down, too I’m not gonna be the boy for you
6.
False Awakening 03:01
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I had a false awakening Wrapped in your hair I could smell the house burning But we went nowhere There were bells ringing Ringing in my ears Showered me in pretty words Had my eyes stinging I could swear Had the tin cans in the window So I could hear you sing But I was leaning too far out You pulled the string and I went swinging Then we’re swimming in the lake And it’s the best day I got a sunburn! I’m so happy you decided to stay I could swear we were there Sweet September Lasts forever And I was standing in your house Feeling comfortable as ever And then we’re hanging from the ceiling by our shoes Slow dancing to your music It was snowing in your room when you tripped And fell into the coldness My hands reached out for you but you were smiling Your eyes closing while you froze into place With that look on your face I could swear we were there
7.
Good for Tonight 03:23
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Body full of longing, but longing for what? What could you want that your hands haven’t already touched? You try to embarrass me, well, that’s sticky and gross But I like you the most Do you wanna just watch me dance? Boredom leads to bad times What’s going on? I can’t pin it down when I do what I want Got love asleep beside me but something’s been wrong I’m good for tonight But it won’t be enough Cause I’ve been at my worst With pearls all on the floor, the homicidal maniac walks out the door And the pop songs play in my head from the night before I want you to go crazy for it Could you go crazy for it? Think you should go crazy for it Boredom leads to bad times What’s going on? I can’t pin it down when I do what I want Got love asleep beside me but something’s been wrong I’m good for tonight But it won’t be enough I’m swimming uphill You can hate me, but you’ll dream about me still Just leave me alone I’m catching my thrills Think I’m bored now But I wanna touch you still Got love asleep beside me but something’s been wrong I’m good for tonight But it won’t be enough
8.
Wake You from a Dream 04:08
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On a night I shouldn’t see you Harvard Avenue is dead Home lures me in like a pristine boat Just asking to be wrecked Won’t you be the glasses held up by my nose? You're something I’ve seen before I’m parting the clouds, periwinkle and rose Something I’ve seen before The men who want me wait for me crossing the bridge How I feel doesn’t matter They persist Won’t you be the glasses stacked up by the bed? You’re somewhere I’ve been before I’m thrown in the clouds, all orange and red Somewhere I’ve been before Did I wake you from a dream? Was she pretty?
9.
Pusher 04:11
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I can’t trust me when I’ve been drinking And you say I make you feel like a kid again I hear your whispers dragging heavy on the floor You tell me fragile truths and nothing more I’d give it all up now to sit on your porch Crack my knuckles on you, smoke you with my last cigarette For someone who couldn't say it with her chest Somehow I miss you every now and then But I’m not your friend I don’t wanna be your friend I hear the story told when I’m fast asleep I’m not my body But you could always bury the lead Paper cut slices and medical dreams I’d tell it all to you, if you were listening I’d still let you walk me in the dark Hands in front of me, catching the wall They can see that I’m a ghost for you An echo that can’t stand repeating But I’m not your friend I don’t wanna be your friend Always the pusher Go chase your thrills without me Always the teacher So patient for you, baby I’m not your therapist Can’t watch you stare at your feet Always the pusher Go chase your thrills without me I don't wanna be your friend I don’t wanna be your friend

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released October 22, 2021

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Olivia Sisay Boston, Massachusetts

Olivia Sisay is a queer Asian-American singer/songwriter born in Pennsylvania and based out of Boston.

“My ex is gonna listen to this”
“If this album doesn’t make you gay, I don’t know what will”
“Strap in and strap-on”
“Olivia Sisay is a PR nightmare” ... more

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